image management

It's a Sunday morning and you lying early morning on a beach side.., sun trying to climb up for a long day run in sky, wind carrying a due and fragrances, birds chirping in ecstasy, and trees dancing with flowing wind and producing music. What a wonderful moment, what a pleasant surroundings, what a moment to capture.. you and just you.. what a wonderful feeling.. heart ponding on it and eyes savoring all the taste they can..

Now brake up and take a complete you turn.. yes a you do take a U turn.. it's a Wednesday evening, after a long working day.. I am sitting here at office, where I can't see sky, and tube lights produce same kind of light indifferent of the time of day. Hence it's virtually impossible to gauze the time of day except you eye that computer screen for clock. Sales people have replaced the chirping of birds and as it is month end hence their language has all kind of politically challenged words, and their voice is rocking on roof top. And here I am sitting, perplexed, with the feelings generated by something which happened during course of day and is now trying to get onto my nerves slowly and gradually, mixed with environmental factors and it's by-products.

I guess I am too confused right now.. you might challenge this saying that as if I am not same most of times, but this is time of those times... I am completely in hallucination.. knowing that what is right still not able to wear that..

And don;t think it;s after effect of India getting kicked out in world cup... I will be last person to get effected due to that I guess.. because they are outside of the circle of confluence.. yes.. they are..

Confused about this words "circle".. ok.. let me try to confuse you more.. actually I have divided people in three categories (influence of carrying those thick physics books and sharing bed with them).. first one is circle in which falls those whom I am concerned with.. anything with them.. and I loose my equilibrium of body, mind and soul..
Then overlapping this, comes the circle of those with whom I interact and who carries virtually zero influence. If they say or do something, it need to pass through my scanner of sanitation and only things which gets certified will be allowed to enter.. no tress passers..
Then comes third circle where whatever happen, carries no influence on my state of equilibrium..

Now doesn;t that sounds too confusing.. and what it had to do with my present.. I guess it does... I hate any change.. any change which can even try to disturb the equilibrium.. though I know I can hardly do anything to save it.. but then.. it is that way... can;t help..

And last two weeks had been enough to disturb it more than thrice.. I lost my Tauji.. I missed my mom like hell.. and I had to change my course of action for someone who doesn't even exist on the umbrella.. but I guess that;s what life is all about..

"Kuch to log kaheinge.. logon ka kaam hai kehna.." playing on winamp.. what a co incidence.. I guess this is what timing is all about..

"Life is about missing expected things and getting unexpected, it doesn;t matter what you think or you are, what matters is what people think you are.. "